Thursday, May 6, 2010


So here I am this morning, in my tragically messy kitchen, trying to clean with my leg in Donovan's vice grip. I'm checking my facebook page occasionally, praying for those that are hurting and lost, listening to what Addison calls "Pays Jesus Moosic" (praise Jesus music). When suddenly I'm just so overcome with feelings of futility for this world. There is so much pain, so much sickness, so much depravity, so much killing and hurting of innocent babies born and unborn, and I just want it all to stop. I felt so alone in my little world all of the sudden. I know that there are millions out there who love God with a vengeance, and daily work to share the salvation of Jesus, but I here I was in my kitchen, getting so discouraged, feeling alone. So, what do I do? I hop onto my favorite Christian author/speaker's blog for some encouraging words. And this is what I found:

"There is ONE who totally gets you. Just one. Yes, we need human support. And, yes, hearts were created to be shared horizontally as well as vertically but no one can see into the grand canyon of your emotional being but God. That’s why we’ll never be okay if, in our deepest, most riveting hurts, we do not turn to Him and let Him completely and intimately tend to us. I am a firm believer in Godly counseling but the best of counselors should point you to the only One who is still there at 3:00 AM when you toss and turn and think you may not live till morning. St. Augustine described God as “interior intimo meo.” Deeper in me than I am in myself. God gets you when YOU don’t even get you. He doesn’t just love you. He loves your heart. Your broken, misshapen, road-weary heart. And mine. Let Him in. Let Him tend. There is SomeOne who really does understand. He is the Lord who heals us." ~Beth Moore

I just really, really love that St. Augustine quote: "Deeper in me than I am in myself." God is aching for this world too... afterall, he loves everyone in it and I don't. I just really want Him to come back soon.

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